Going Home for Christmas- Part 1

 I’m writing this entry whilst I’m traveling to Copenhagen to catch my flight home for Christmas. I’m sitting on the bus but we just came off the Jutland to Zealand ferry. Not too far to go now. As we drive through the Danish countryside on this grey, misty December day I’m thinking about my experience living in Denmark so far and how I feel about going home for Christmas and coming back again in three weeks.

Well I’d be lying if I said that my time so far hasn’t been turbulent. There have been some real, euphoric highs but also some pretty crushing lows. Looking back I’ve realized that there were so many things which I never expected to be challenging. I’m not saying that I’ve breezed through life up to this point, of course I haven’t, but I have always prided myself on being able to get along with people. One of my real joys in life is meeting new people and sharing good times. 

I’ve had some experience living abroad before but never for this long. Forcing yourself to settle in because you know you have to stay for a long time is a difficult thing to do. In my first couple of weeks, maybe the first few months, I pushed myself so hard. I’d already pushed myself out of my comfort zone by coming here, but I had to do it again and again as I made new friends and negotiated cultural differences. Things that I’ve taken for granted my whole life suddenly became somewhat irrelevant or challenged. Now, I’m finally beginning to see the benefits. I have had an incredible time getting to know my coursemates, I am so lucky to have the opportunity to study and make friends with people from 48 nationalities. I have learnt so much from them all and it has been great fun! I think that I put too much pressure on myself though and took things a bit too personally. 

So what have I learned so far?

About myself

I have learned to trust myself far more than I ever did. I have a higher stress threshold than I thought. Yes, there have been times, especially during my week-long exams, when I have seriously doubted myself and panicked. This usually ends up with teary or stressed skype sessions. However, I have now completed 3 week-long assignments! My first, was an essay about how globalization has affected war reporting. My second exam was split into two essays, one asked whether there is such a thing as a global journalist and the other explored the idea of citizen journalism. Finally, I have just finished a paper about world order and how it is likely to change in the coming decades. All three assignments covered topics that I had no real knowledge of 3 and a half months ago. But to have written all three and not just survived but actually produced work I am proud of, is one of my biggest achievements and gives me faith in my ability. 

I have also learnt that I am Strong (yes, with a capital ‘S’!)  I haven’t always been strong but certainly in the past 2-3 years and that strength is growing as I become more and more self-assured. I have learnt to deal with multiple things going wrong in one day, not always remaining calm, mind you, but getting through it. Also, there is strength in asking for help. In my first few weeks I felt very alone, especially as I kept getting horrifically lost everywhere, but, in the times since then I have begun to reach out to people and share things that I am finding difficult. I have, so far, overcome a lot of different problems and that gives me strength.

About bikes

What have I learnt about my bike? Well, I’ve found that it doesn’t really like me, but then that’s ok because the feeling is mutual. In Aarhus I am really reliant on my bike to get around. Buses generally stop running quite early, so if I want to go out in the evening I need to cycle. Also I don’t live with a big group of course-mates so I have to sort myself out, when it comes to traveling home from nights out. Most of my problems have been caused by my bike lock breaking or my chain falling off but I have now overcome both. A janitor sawed off my bike lock when the key snapped in it and I can now put my chain back on in less than two minutes. I have also learnt to cycle up hill in 4^th gear. Not in an attractive way, but who cares if it gets you up the hill. My bike likes to play games with me by refusing to change gear until I get over the top of the hill. It then changes to 1^st gear and my legs end up spinning around.

I’ve also learnt that people cycle very fast in Denmark, especially if they are late for lectures, but I can keep up! I’ve also witnessed my very first bike jam, every Tuesday on my way to running group I get stuck in a queue of cyclists on their way home. There’s even been a bit of bike rage!

Going Home for Christmas- Part 2

About Denmark

This is an interesting one. I now have some really good Danish friends (you know who you are, so if you’re reading this it’s not about you). I’ve learned that shopping in Denmark is very different from shopping in the UK. Expect Danes to travel from A to B, through a crowd with serious commitment. This means that you should expect to be bulldozed by buggies or pushed out of the way. Just know that it is not personal, they treat everyone the same. In shops don’t expect people to point out the free checkouts, they will make their way to them in the said committed way. Also don’t really expect to queue, at least not in the British way, you have to keep your eye out for free checkouts, if you snooze, you lose. Also, if you’re in the way, expect to be pushed or picked up and moved (yes, this happened to me!). I’ve also learned that British politeness doesn’t really get you anywhere here. I can stand and hold the door open for many people but very few will acknowledge my existence let alone thank me for it. It’s not rude it’s just a different culture. 

Tivoli Gardens, Copenhagen

Also thanks to my News editor role at Jutland Station I have now learned a huge amount about both Danish politics and the Danish media. It’s been a truly worthwhile experience I have been able to chat with my flatmates and other Danish friends about what is happening in the Danish news, be it a footballer nearly winning the Danish ‘Strictly Come Dancing’ or a political scandal involving the Justice Minister and Head of the Danish Intelligence Service. There’s a bit of a joke that I know more about Denmark than some Danes.  

About friendships

I have learned that I really value loyalty, in friendships especially. When you strike out on your own and have to go back to basics to make new friends you learn exactly what you value in friends. Sometimes I am not too good at this, especially in some recent cases of saying that I’ll go to things and then changing my mind. All I can say is that I am working on it. 

Julefrokost- Christmas lunch

The spaghetti and polo game

I have also learned that you need to put yourself out there and get to know people in different contexts. That’s why my running group has been so good. We had a ‘Julefrokost’ or Christmas lunch the other weekend and it was a great opportunity to get to know some of my running mates. The group put a huge amount of effort into organizing fun and games for the night and it was really fantastic. We ate traditional Danish food, learned traditional Danish dancing and played team games. One game involved dried spaghetti and polos! Each person had a piece of dry spaghetti and they had to put it in their mouth and pass a polo around the whole team, needless to say the results were truly hilarious! I also got to try the infamous Danish schnaps, which tasted better than I thought it would but still wouldn’t be my drink of choice.

About Friends and Family

I’ve also learned a lot about my long-standing friendships, it’s been great catching up with good friends via Skype or Google Hang-out and knowing that although I’m living in Denmark I can keep up to date with their lives. Sunday nights become dedicated to family and friends with lots of Skype-dates scheduled back to back. I look forward to it and have found that I can keep up with them all more than I probably did when I was in the UK. 

Blue Book party

I’ve even had two of my good friends Jo and Bronwen come over to visit me. We had a really lovely time exploring the city, making food together and drinking cocktails. I took them to a party that I’d organized to celebrate the launch of the Blue Book on the Friday. Then on Saturday we visited Aros the art museum and had dinner followed by cocktails. On Sunday I introduced them to the wonderful ‘Sostrene Grene’ or Sisters Grene, a cheap and cheerful shop full of fantastic little pieces that make great gifts. We also visited the deer park and the cake buffet at ‘Globen Flakket’. It was so nice to catch up properly over a couple of days. 

At the Deer Park

My mum and dad also came over to see me in Copenhagen so I had two great weekends back to back. We met at the hotel on the Friday night and spent the weekend walking, talking and shopping. We visited Nyhavn, the Little Mermaid or ‘Lille Havfrue’ and the magical Tivoli gardens which were decorated for Christmas. I also got to introduce mum and dad to Gløgg, or Scandinavian mulled wine, at a Christmas market and teach them the very little Danish I’d learned so far. It was a really lovely weekend, made all the better by the fact that I returned to Aarhus and was greeted by two weeks of exams. 

 

My time in Denmark so far has really heightened my appreciation of my friends and family because I am reminded all the time, by the many photos bluetacked to my walls, my skype dates and parcels from my friends and family that I have a fantastic support network. I am so grateful that so many people support me and I hope that I show them just how much I appreciate them. 

Mum and I at the Christmas market

About my relationship

Normally I’m not one to share personal details but spending time apart from my boyfriend has obviously taught me a lot about relationships too. I have learned to be strong and look after myself but also to talk about any problems that I do have over skype. I am so lucky that James has really been my rock since I have been here. Every time I’ve doubted my decision he has sought to remind me why I decided to come here in the first place and send me the occasional motivational video or funny story. If I’ve come back late and needed to talk he’s been there. This means that I am extremely excited to see him this Christmas, it’s the first time that we will be able to celebrate Christmas together because he was in Austria last year. The next three weeks are going to fly by but it’s going to be so special to be home and to tell my stories from the past three and a half months.

I’ve learned a huge amount since I first moved to Denmark. I’m sure there is much more to learn when I return in January. But for the meantime I’m going to relax and enjoy the company of my family and friends.